Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! It's a blog from Mary!

At long last...what's this?...a blog?

Warmest Autumn Greetings Dear Parents and Friends! 

After 9 months of silence you must be wondering 'what on earth....?'

Well on earth, specifically all over this beautiful country, it has been a breathtaking journey! In fact the fullness of it just took me over, and blogging, I do apologise, went out the window! It was all I could do to keep up with demand.

At the time of the last blog I was having my first break after the initial leg of the tour, which had taken dog, self and campervan to Waiheke, Tauranga, Christchurch and Hawkes Bay. After a sparkling start to the book on a frosty-white morning at Helen's on the Tukituki, I had journeyed to Greytown to settle down to write. I was about to learn many things!

I did write in earnest and and managed a strong beginning to the book. But it took much time to find the right rhythm and to discover my best approach. The crazy preceding months of moving out of Plum Garden and then intensely lecturing and counselling on the road for 3 months meant that my bookeeping and admin were way behind. At the same time requests for counselling were increasing dramatically as the work became more widely known (my email box was going mad right in front of my eyes!) and I still needed to work to support myself. The writing kept getting hijacked! (I see all you writers nodding: 'well hello Newby!') 

For some reason I thought I could write while still plugged in to cell phone, emails, the Greytown cafes :), tax return deadlines, backed-up admin, setting up the next legs of the tour, family, friends and dear desperate parents needing help in Wellington and all round the country. Yeah right!!! I must add, however, that it was wonderful to spend time with my sister and parents in Masterton during that period, and my siblings and sons in Wellington.

With support from an amazing couple (you know who you are...I can't thank you enough darlings!) I was able to extend that writing period longer than I thought possible and 'The Work'...meaning 'the ideas and how to best present them' took on a whole new life. I found my ground and my stride. It was a huge turning point. 

For those who are new to this blog, I'm touring the Steiner school communities in New Zealand for a 2-year period in response to their requests. They were the first to hear about my work and word spread quickly. So far this is filling all my availability but but eventually it is my hope to make this work widely available to the public, not only through public speaking and mentoring sessions, but also through a book and online access to the material. 

As the daffodils came up in September I stopped writing and bade farewell to Greytown and, after a stint in Wellington to see clients, headed north again back on tour. From September to December the road took me to Titirangi, Auckland briefly, Hamilton, Tauranga again, and back to Wellington, in each centre first giving lectures then offering parent counselling sessions. By then I was also meeting with teachers and contributing thoughts and ideas to their work. This has been most enriching.

Highlights of that period

Titirangi: Plunging hills rich with gorgeous bush, (I even got stuck magnicently at the bottom of one after weeks of sub-tropical rain!) tidal flats, wild coast, green everywhere, the maypole dance at the magical, country Titirangi Steiner School...and best of all the Titirangi Village Market...it's a must do! Gretchen, Jasman and Elia gave me access to their tiny home and enormous hearts, and my cousin Jacquie nestled me in her secret garden and soothed my soul!

Titirangi bush garden

Auckland: My first look at Ellerslie and Michael Park School. What wonderful energy! A great conference featuring Peter Blom, CEO of Triodos Bank, talking about sustainable banking on the cutting edge in Europe...thrilling!...and a week of giving counselling sessions. Auckland's best kept secret...the Remuera Motor Lodge campground, tucked behind a strip of great restaurants, had me parked up and living the Remuera life for around $20 per night! Sadly it's recently been sold (for 7.9 million!)..and will eventually be bowled for housing development. More on Auckland later.

Hamilton: Extraordinary! I had always driven past Hamilton not realising what gems lay hidden there; the Botanical gardens and many green spaces, all gathered around the Waikato River and a lovely lake to walk around. I was most warmly hosted by Warwick and Claire Hutchinson who had me gasping with amazement at all that has been created there at the school and the birthing centre. Carol (early childhood co-ordinator) and Marianne (principal) took me under their wings and my experience in that community was rich and deep. There was also a day-trip to Raglan with my neice Emma...that little hippie seaside village is sooo yummy and the walk from the bay to the big sea is stunning. Another must on the traveller's list!

Tauranga: Thanks to the incredible enthusiasm of Mary the school principal and my dear hosts Rebecca, Graham, Stella and George, my time in Tauranga has turned into an ongoing love affair! I was quickly put under a spell by staying right on Papamoa Beach...where I swear the sun is brighter and the waves are whiter...(well not during the Rena disaster of course!) and the rest is history! I think just about every parent in the school there has now attended the Roots and Wings lectures and the community response has been incredible. Tauranga has a triangle of delights: Papamoa Beach, Mt. Maunganui and around the school the lush hills of Welcome Bay. This is kiwi fruit country. I seem to be never quite finished there!

Papamoa beach

Originally the tour was supposed to be for just one year but when I arrived back in Wellington at Christmas there were still so many Steiner schools and kindergartens in New Zealand wanting me to come that I realised I would need to be on the road for another year. Before I could make up my mind bookings for 2013 were coming in thick and fast. 

From Christmas to the end of February I worked in Wellington, 'flat out', seeing clients, trying to catch up on admin, meeting with colleagues to support children and preparing lectures. I just 'ran' and there was very little chance to meet with family and friends. Luckily I did manage some special time with my dear friend, Julia, before she left to work for 2 years in East Timor. It was a chaotic time due to the tangle of threads that the year had spawned. I could see that I needed to learn to 'ride this eagle' much better! I kept starting a blog to let everyone know what was happening but then the next demand would hit, and before I knew it my time in Wellington was over and I was swept away back on tour. 

The highlight of the summer was a 2-day seminar I was asked to give to a faculty of teachers in Christchurch late in January. I was able to present some new work based on studying the interaction of the temperaments in parents and children during the last 6 years of counselling families. It is a whole new approach based on compassion for the burden each temperament has to carry, on the unique challenges of different combinations, and on finding the way forward by focusing on the gifts that lie within the temperaments. I use this method with great success in the parent-child relationship and when doing couple counselling with parents, which is increasingly a component of the work. The preparation for this seminar ate up my January but was incredibly worthwhile. 'The Work' took another giant step forward.

So far this year I have spent all of March in Auckland giving 10 lectures and 75 hours of counselling. Then there was a wonderful short trip to Kerikeri to lecture to the kindergarten parents there, before heading to Hawkes Bay.

Highlights 

Auckland: Having never lived in Auckland it was my time to realise the incredible geography. It really is built on a cluster of volcanoes in the middle of the sea...like the whole country I guess, but more so! I really couldn't believe my eyes as I explored those cones and craters right in suburbia! The campervan was tucked behind the house of my wonderful hosts, Karen, Sarah, Rebecca and Benjamin, and right around the corner another dear family, Kirsten, Roger, Celia and Katelyn made a brand new room in their garage available to me for counselling...complete with visiting chickens! I was so blown away by their generosity! Both these homes were walking distance from the school, and the icing on the cake was the wonderful Waiataroa wetland park close by where Magic and I went walking for an hour every evening around 5pm on those hot summer nights. It was sheer heaven and I could not have hoped for a happier Auckland experience! Another special treat was the devine Mexican cafe in Ellerslie...where I managed a few lunches between clients...one for the gourmet list visitors!

Kerikeri: Oh wow! You should see this kindergarten out in the country in Oromahoe on the farm that provides milk to the Mahoe Biodynamic cheesemakers. The children walk over to the cheesery and pop their noses over the counter to receive little samples of cheese! It is a magical place. Christianne, the kindergarten teacher, also showed me around her farm. This is real kiwi (bird) country and is studded with extraordinary clusters of stunning rocks, old trees and hidden springs. A very moving experience. The area of Kerikeri is much more tropical. They say they can grow anything there! The little town is vibrant and full of artistic projects, and there is some great early history in the area, including New Zealand's oldest house.

The sign to Mahoe Kindergarten, Kerikeri

Taupo. One of my favourite aspects to cris-crossing the North island has been passing several times, on the run, through Lake Taupo. I usually arrive late afternoon and check in to De Bretts campground then commence a great routine. First a long walk on the beach in the sun with the dog. Next, dinner at Taupo's best kept secret, Indian Delights, with big picture windows fully opened to watch the sunset over the lake and mountains. The food and service are to die for! A must for the list! Then in the morning I have a big soak in the mineral hotsprings before hitting the road! This is always my time to go silent and breath out between communities. I'm looking forward to stopping in Taupo longer soon to give the Roots and Wings lectures.



    Parked up in Cambridge                   View from Indian Delights restaurant, Taupo

So that brings us to now. There is a warm breeze this morning and the leaves are cascading down. Can you believe I've  been living in a campervan for 14 months?! At present I'm in Hastings, Hawkes Bay, parked up with my dear aunt Judith, having just given a week of lectures to the student teachers at Taruna in Havelock North. It's so wonderful to work with them. 

                                                         white rainbow in the rising morning dew at Havelock North campground

The school holidays are full-on with admin and lecture prep, followed by 2 more days of lecturing at Taruna and 4 days with lectures at the Taikura Steiner School in Hastings. Then it will be lickety-split back to the Kapiti Coast to be the key-note speaker for a 1-day conference for parents of young children entitled 'Simply Parenting', at Te Ra School. 

In the remainder of 2013 I will visit kindergartens in Palmerston North, Rotorua, Taupo, Coromandel, and schools in Tauranga and Wellington, then hopefully take the ferry back to the South Island in Term 4 to Motueka, Dunedin, Invercargill and one more visit to Christchurch where life is still far from 'back to normal' for many after the quakes...though I sensed a turning point in their energy in January. They are working so hard at it...such an inspiration! 

Perhaps the biggest challenge of the year will be the Australasian bi-annual early childhood conference in Cambridge at the end of September, sharing the co-keynote speaker role with Renate Long-Breipohl, awesome author of 'Supporting Self-Directed Play' and 'Under the Stars'. Gulp. 

During the tour I have had much time to reflect on the Plum Garden Parenting Centre in Brooklyn and to miss it and all the families very much. I still grieve over the loss of it and all the work so many put into it. Despite all the wonderful places along the way I have come to realise even more what a passion I have for Wellington City...though I must admit it's been lovely to be consistently warm! It is my hope to take up residence there again in January 2014 and start afresh. Lots of ideas! More on that as it shapes up. 

Many clients along the way have said something like: 'we have been to so many counsellors and services but none have helped us like your information and suggestions do.' So I have come to realise that the 'counselling' I do is more like 'mentoring' as it teaches parents how to understand children and themselves, and how to change things on a practical level. So I am tending to use that word 'mentoring' more these days.

There are clearly 2 journeys. The outer journey of participating in the lives of communities and the inner journey of the content of 'the work'. With every lecture and every client session I learn something new, and figure out a simpler way to say things. I absolutely LOVE this work and can't believe how lucky I am to meet so many amazing, loving people and see this country in all its glory while doing it.

In every destination a special family has come forward to host me on their property, gifting rich and deep moments, showing me their towns, countryside and schools, sharing their food and hearts. These families are like family to me now..anchor points of love and shelter for the gypsy! To all of you whom I've met on the way, who have shared your wisdom and tables with me these last 14 months...thank you dearly from the bottom of my heart. You have made it all possible and I could never thank you enough.

Daffy Duck (the campervan) is hanging in there, gallantally trucking us over hill and dale...and hill! She's given me many lessons in courage and equanimity! Magic the dog just seems to get younger and perkier as the trip goes on (she's nearly 13 now!)...perhaps it's all the adapating she has had to do! Challenge creates resilience :). I'm feeling better than ever, now that I'm getting used to it. Up the mountain, through the red zone and over :). Gosh, living in a house again will be so weird! 

Magic asleep in the sun while I work

Last of all a very big thank you to my son Joe, who is the creator of the Plum website which so many of you have used to register for counselling/mentoring. I've been an appalling customer and he has been so tolerant of my neglectful blogging and ghastly computer skills. He hauls me into the 21st century and without him this whole work would not have been possible. 

Very warmest wishes to you all as we slip from this golden summer towards winter. You are doing the most important job in the world! All hope depends on you! Keep the compost bin handy...and may your Big Selves be with you!

Much love, Mary.

     rainbow's end...right where I lay my head!